{"content":{"sharePage":{"page":0,"digests":[{"id":"17692805","dateCreated":"1259853724","smartDate":"Dec 3, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"meghanweis","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/meghanweis","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"},"monitored":false,"locked":false,"links":{"self":"https:\/\/fall20096plus1traitsscoring.wikispaces.com\/share\/view\/17692805"},"dateDigested":1532390392,"startDate":null,"sharedType":"discussion","title":"what the qualities of a good teacher","description":"I would score this piece as a three.  The writer doesn't make all that many spelling or grammatical errors, but the sentence structures are not very strong.  I think with a good edit on this piece, the writer could make it a lot stronger and better.","replyPages":[{"page":0,"digests":[{"id":"17732871","body":"This piece is a three. The writer is on the right track. The sentences are weak, but they are well-structured. Grammatically, the paper is appropriate and correct. However, there are spelling errors. I think a three is appropriate.","dateCreated":"1259892173","smartDate":"Dec 3, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"eileens.09","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/eileens.09","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17789991","body":"The introduction and conclusion are very clear. I like how they told us right off the bat what they were going to talk about. Connections between the ideas are kind of fuzzy and there is logic in the sequencing, though it is kind of predictable and rehearsed. Pacing is pretty good and a title is present, though not very original. Sometimes I felt the urge to slip in a transition or move things around. This i clearly a three. I don't think grammatical errors are considered in the organization rubric.","dateCreated":"1260030681","smartDate":"Dec 5, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"tr44701","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/tr44701","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17792287","body":"oops! once again I confused which one you were writing about! sorry!","dateCreated":"1260038100","smartDate":"Dec 5, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"tr44701","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/tr44701","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17792371","body":"There are some errors in punctuation and some spelling. You're should be your. Punctuation isn't really creative, but capitalization is correct. Use of grammar somewhat contributes to the style. Paragraphing is accurate and bunches ideas together. Very close to publishing, I think some creativity and minor details could help it out. I give it a five.","dateCreated":"1260038462","smartDate":"Dec 5, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"tr44701","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/tr44701","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17792397","body":"On second thought, I think this deserves a four, because it is kind of in between for me. I don't think the usage of the conventions was very creative but there weren't many errors, so it is close to being a five.","dateCreated":"1260038588","smartDate":"Dec 5, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"tr44701","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/tr44701","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17858349","body":"I am going to have to go with a three as well. the writer does have good organization. There is clearly a introduction and conclusion, but I also feel that this could be better. As someone else stated maybe with some peer editing\/editing it could be a 5.","dateCreated":"1260219181","smartDate":"Dec 7, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"jackieb1621","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/jackieb1621","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}}],"more":0}]},{"id":"17692653","dateCreated":"1259853573","smartDate":"Dec 3, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"meghanweis","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/meghanweis","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"},"monitored":false,"locked":false,"links":{"self":"https:\/\/fall20096plus1traitsscoring.wikispaces.com\/share\/view\/17692653"},"dateDigested":1532390393,"startDate":null,"sharedType":"discussion","title":"aunt leisa","description":"This writer makes a lot of grammar and spelling errors.  I would score this piece as a three.  The writer does create a nice, easily read passage however, so I don't think it deserves a one.  This piece would be very good if it did not have so many grammatical and spelling errors.  This makes it somewhat difficult to read.","replyPages":[{"page":0,"digests":[{"id":"17692845","body":"Actually now re-reading this piece, it does deserve a one.  The ideas are well thought out, but the spelling and grammatical errors are just too distracting and take away from the writing.","dateCreated":"1259853776","smartDate":"Dec 3, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"meghanweis","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/meghanweis","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17733031","body":"The paper has too many grammatical and spelling errors to concentrate. The sentences could be strong and well-structured, but with a lack of grammar, the sentences are confusing and weak. I agree that this essay deserves a one. It has a lot of potential. After the writer perfects his\/her grammatical knowledge, this could be a strong passage. For now, it is weak and ill-structured. For now, it deserves a one.","dateCreated":"1259892331","smartDate":"Dec 3, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"eileens.09","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/eileens.09","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17792265","body":"Lots and lots of spelling errors, major revision! They do use some correct sentence with the use of quotations when someone is speaking. Punctuation is ok, but some parts could be worked on. It's also just one big paragraph and could be split up into multiple ideas in multiple paragraphs. I agree that it has a lot of potential, I can see where it's going, and it could definitely be good work once the errors are fixed. The main problem that I see is spelling, which deters from the story, which overall once fixed could be interesting. This is a one.","dateCreated":"1260038029","smartDate":"Dec 5, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"tr44701","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/tr44701","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17881991","body":"I agree as well I am going to have to score this writer a 1, since "errors in spelling, punctuation, capitalization, grammar, and usage, and\/or paragraphing repeatedly distract the reader and make the text difficult to read". there are too many spelling and grammatical errors that cause the readers to stress and have a hard time reading the writers story.","dateCreated":"1260245864","smartDate":"Dec 7, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"jackieb1621","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/jackieb1621","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}}],"more":0}]},{"id":"17692573","dateCreated":"1259853429","smartDate":"Dec 3, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"meghanweis","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/meghanweis","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"},"monitored":false,"locked":false,"links":{"self":"https:\/\/fall20096plus1traitsscoring.wikispaces.com\/share\/view\/17692573"},"dateDigested":1532390393,"startDate":null,"sharedType":"discussion","title":"remembering our flag","description":"Again, I would score this piece as a five.  The writer does demonstrate a good grasp of standard writing conventions.  There are very few, if any, spelling and grammar errors.  The writer is very creative with this piece, and it deserves the recognition it is getting.","replyPages":[{"page":0,"digests":[{"id":"17732733","body":"The writer shows that he\/she has a strong sense of writing conventions--spelling, grammar, punctuation. The paper is flawless, with hardly any errors. Also, the piece was complex, which required the student to use a variety of conventions. The author does so appropriately.","dateCreated":"1259892025","smartDate":"Dec 3, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"eileens.09","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/eileens.09","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17732729","body":"The writer shows that he\/she has a strong sense of writing conventions--spelling, grammar, punctuation. The paper is flawless, with hardly any errors. Also, the piece was complex, which required the student to use a variety of conventions. The author does so appropriately.","dateCreated":"1259892025","smartDate":"Dec 3, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"eileens.09","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/eileens.09","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17792003","body":"Very strong writing. There are only a few errors that could easily be fixed, and they don't detract from the meaning. The structures are strong and varied, which makes it expressive and enthralling. They also do a great job of enhancing the meaning of the text and they add style and are natural. The sentences also do a good job of building upon each other to add suspense to the narrative. Definitely a five.","dateCreated":"1260037133","smartDate":"Dec 5, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"tr44701","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/tr44701","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17792079","body":"oops wrong "remembering our flag"","dateCreated":"1260037444","smartDate":"Dec 5, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"tr44701","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/tr44701","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17792167","body":"There's only three spelling errors and rally no punctuation or capitalization errors. Punctuation is pretty creative which adds to the text. The use of grammar and punctuation add to the writer's style. Only a few small details and it's ready to publish. This is a five.","dateCreated":"1260037699","smartDate":"Dec 5, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"tr44701","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/tr44701","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17797001","body":"I agree--five.","dateCreated":"1260052739","smartDate":"Dec 5, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"eileens.09","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/eileens.09","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17857449","body":"Sorry about posting this so late guys! I agree as well remembering our falg was written extremely well and it is true there are some errors but as someone already has stated the errors do not take away from the writer's ideas. I would rate this a 5 as well","dateCreated":"1260218095","smartDate":"Dec 7, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"jackieb1621","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/jackieb1621","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}}],"more":0}]},{"id":"17692413","dateCreated":"1259853249","smartDate":"Dec 3, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"meghanweis","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/meghanweis","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"},"monitored":false,"locked":false,"links":{"self":"https:\/\/fall20096plus1traitsscoring.wikispaces.com\/share\/view\/17692413"},"dateDigested":1532390394,"startDate":null,"sharedType":"discussion","title":"all about rabbits","description":"I would score this piece with a one.  This passage is kind of read like one big paragraph.  There are very few pauses, and it does not flow well enough to be read with understanding.  The sentences are all jumbled together, making this piece sound confusing and messy.","replyPages":[{"page":0,"digests":[{"id":"17732607","body":"I scored this piece with a one. There was no sentence structure, and there was no punctuation. The passage was full of run-ons, which seemed to run on and on and on. The passage was a combination of run-on and ons and simple sentences. It was just awkward to read.","dateCreated":"1259891891","smartDate":"Dec 3, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"eileens.09","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/eileens.09","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17792053","body":"A lot of the words are used wrong and can detract from meaning, for example, hard instead of heart. There's also a lot of grammatical and spelling errors. It's like they just used whatever popped into their heads, with no rhyme or reason. No connections are present between sentences and it's not expressive at all. This is a one.","dateCreated":"1260037352","smartDate":"Dec 5, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"tr44701","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/tr44701","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17883023","body":"I defenitely would rate this passage a 1 as well. The writer has no structure and there is a lot of grammatical and spellling errors which cause frustration to the readers. It was akward and frustrating to read. There was direction in the piece either.","dateCreated":"1260248446","smartDate":"Dec 7, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"jackieb1621","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/jackieb1621","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}}],"more":0}]},{"id":"17692275","dateCreated":"1259853092","smartDate":"Dec 3, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"meghanweis","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/meghanweis","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"},"monitored":false,"locked":false,"links":{"self":"https:\/\/fall20096plus1traitsscoring.wikispaces.com\/share\/view\/17692275"},"dateDigested":1532390394,"startDate":null,"sharedType":"discussion","title":"remembering our flag","description":"I would score this piece with a five.  The writer makes this passage flow very beautifully, and I even got really interested in reading it.  The sentences are very well built, and constructed in a way that enhances the meaning.  There are very few fragments, and there is great energy from this piece.","replyPages":[{"page":0,"digests":[{"id":"17732491","body":"This passage is a five. The writer uses a variety of sentence structures, changing them up appropriately. In doing so, this made the passage flow nicely. It gave emphasis on things that were important. It definitely invites expressive oral reading.","dateCreated":"1259891775","smartDate":"Dec 3, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"eileens.09","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/eileens.09","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17792095","body":"Very strong writing. There are only a few errors that could easily be fixed, and they don't detract from the meaning. The structures are strong and varied, which makes it expressive and enthralling. They also do a great job of enhancing the meaning of the text and they add style and are natural. The sentences also do a good job of building upon each other to add suspense to the narrative. Definitely a five.","dateCreated":"1260037471","smartDate":"Dec 5, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"tr44701","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/tr44701","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17882975","body":"I would defnitely score this passage a 5. The writer sets up the readers for the story and grabs the attention of the reader right a way. The writer writed in such a way in which everything is fluid and every passage transitions into the next one, therefore making it easy to follow.","dateCreated":"1260248324","smartDate":"Dec 7, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"jackieb1621","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/jackieb1621","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}}],"more":0}]},{"id":"17692093","dateCreated":"1259852909","smartDate":"Dec 3, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"meghanweis","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/meghanweis","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"},"monitored":false,"locked":false,"links":{"self":"https:\/\/fall20096plus1traitsscoring.wikispaces.com\/share\/view\/17692093"},"dateDigested":1532390395,"startDate":null,"sharedType":"discussion","title":"Bud","description":"I would score BUD as a one.  The writer's sentences were choppy, incomplete, and rambling.  The writer needs more practice in writing sentences that flow together more smoothly.  The sentences are very short and contain many errors.","replyPages":[{"page":0,"digests":[{"id":"17732413","body":"I scored this passage as a one. The writer used simple sentences the entire time, making it choppy. Phrasing did not sound natural. There is no sentence sense; they do not mesh. The text does not invite expressive oral reading. If I were to read this aloud, it was be choppy and monotone.","dateCreated":"1259891683","smartDate":"Dec 3, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"eileens.09","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/eileens.09","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17791931","body":"Bud did this, Bud did that - it sounds like those Dick and Jane books haha. The sentence structure was really weak. You couldn't really tell when Bud was talking literally or through narration. Some sentences needed to be combined and some deleted. It's not natural at all, just a compilation of random thoughts. Even if there was major editing the sentences still wouldn't flow together. This is a one.","dateCreated":"1260036814","smartDate":"Dec 5, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"tr44701","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/tr44701","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17882725","body":"I nwould rate this passage a 1 as well. the sentences are choppy and do not flow. The writing should be more fluid and transition better, but it feel like the writer is almost giving a recap or even directions: "first they did...next they did..."","dateCreated":"1260247702","smartDate":"Dec 7, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"jackieb1621","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/jackieb1621","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}}],"more":0}]},{"id":"17645593","dateCreated":"1259779714","smartDate":"Dec 2, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"meghanweis","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/meghanweis","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"},"monitored":false,"locked":false,"links":{"self":"https:\/\/fall20096plus1traitsscoring.wikispaces.com\/share\/view\/17645593"},"dateDigested":1532390395,"startDate":null,"sharedType":"discussion","title":"A&W","description":"This piece written by the fourth grader was fantastic.  This writer included just the right amount of detailed words and the writing flowed very smoothly and naturally.  I really enjoyed reading this piece and i would score it as a five.","replyPages":[{"page":0,"digests":[{"id":"17732257","body":"This essay deserves a five!! The student was so descriptive and used a variety of eye-catching words! The detail was fantastic. I felt like I was right there with the author. It also made me hungry, and I don't even eat meat!!","dateCreated":"1259891537","smartDate":"Dec 3, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"eileens.09","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/eileens.09","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17791879","body":"The language is very natural and detailed without being overdone. The words chosen describe the actions and give you a clear vision and understanding of the story. Precision is obvious, though I think the work could be improved with more of a variety of words. This gets a five.","dateCreated":"1260036524","smartDate":"Dec 5, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"tr44701","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/tr44701","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17882615","body":"Haha! I was getting hungry while reading this passage. i would defnitely rate this passage a 5, because the variety of wrods used to describe the the things in the passage are excellent. the writer uses word choices appropriately and in wasy such that they capture the attention of the reader and they hold it throughout the whole story.","dateCreated":"1260247393","smartDate":"Dec 7, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"jackieb1621","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/jackieb1621","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}}],"more":0}]},{"id":"17645449","dateCreated":"1259779583","smartDate":"Dec 2, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"meghanweis","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/meghanweis","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"},"monitored":false,"locked":false,"links":{"self":"https:\/\/fall20096plus1traitsscoring.wikispaces.com\/share\/view\/17645449"},"dateDigested":1532390395,"startDate":null,"sharedType":"discussion","title":"my most rewarding moment","description":"I would score this piece as a five because they writing includes several unique and interesting words.  The language and phrasing is for the most part natural, but at times it would be hard to believe that this is dialogue between two people because of the different choice of words.  The writer has really taken their time here to include interesting words into the story.","replyPages":[{"page":0,"digests":[{"id":"17732097","body":"This piece deserves a score of five. The author has a large vocabulary, and it shows in this piece. The writer uses words that are powerful and engaging. The striking writing style really caught my eye. Though the words were so striking, the writing seemed really natural. The words were used properly, and they seemed to really flow in the paper.","dateCreated":"1259891372","smartDate":"Dec 3, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"eileens.09","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/eileens.09","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17791793","body":"The use of deplored, impeached, scanned, disputed, propitious, impelled,and beseached don't fit at all. Did they use a messed up thesaurus for this? While they use plenty of big words, they didn't fit at all with the meaning. They were distracting and confusing. While they thought the words out carefully, they don't support the meaning well and are too much to be used in everyday language. The words are lively but I'm not sure if a five is an accurate score given the fact that none of them fit. I would give this a two.","dateCreated":"1260036276","smartDate":"Dec 5, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"tr44701","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/tr44701","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17796951","body":"Ha, I feel so ignorant. After a fourteen hour day, I did not notice that those words make absolutely no sense at all. I should probably go back and read these. You're absolutely right. Deplored, impeached, etc...they are not the appropriate words in the least. They're just big and fancy. What are we grading them on? Word choice? Then, yeah it's like a two because they do not display an understanding of vocabulary and accuracy of word choice.","dateCreated":"1260052574","smartDate":"Dec 5, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"eileens.09","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/eileens.09","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17857633","body":"I had to reread this story too, at first I was very surprised that student was using such "big" voacbulary words, but as you all pointed out, they may be big words but the words are not used in the right context and therefore take away from the story. As I was reading this story I had to keep rereading and trying to understand what the  student was trying to write. I agree a score of a 2 asounds accurate.","dateCreated":"1260218363","smartDate":"Dec 7, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"jackieb1621","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/jackieb1621","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}}],"more":0}]},{"id":"17644885","dateCreated":"1259779062","smartDate":"Dec 2, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"meghanweis","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/meghanweis","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"},"monitored":false,"locked":false,"links":{"self":"https:\/\/fall20096plus1traitsscoring.wikispaces.com\/share\/view\/17644885"},"dateDigested":1532390396,"startDate":null,"sharedType":"discussion","title":"my mother is nice","description":"I would score this piece as a one.  The writer demonstrates a very limited vocabulary and overuses the word nice.  This piece is written in a very generic way.  The words and phrases are very unimaginative and lifeless.","replyPages":[{"page":0,"digests":[{"id":"17731963","body":"This paper is a one. The author does not use a variety of words to describe the topic. The author uses two words: nice and fun, and the author sticks with using just these two words as descriptors the entire time. There is limited vocabulary. As far as word choice goes, this essay is a one.","dateCreated":"1259891234","smartDate":"Dec 3, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"eileens.09","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/eileens.09","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17791685","body":"I completely agree, it was kind of aggravating to only hear two words! The words are nonspecific and don't really describe the mother very well and when the author uses them they don't go into detail about why this is so, Why is your mother nice? While the words work in the piece, they are so limited that it really hurts it. The words and phrases used are so unimaginative that they do nothing for the meaning of the piece and the redundancy is distracting. This is a one.","dateCreated":"1260035785","smartDate":"Dec 5, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"tr44701","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/tr44701","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17882539","body":"I agree with everyone as well. I would defnitely score this piece a 1. The writer only uses the words: nice and fun to describe their mother and could have used a bigger variety of words for this piece. They are descibing their mother and all they can say is she is nice and fun. Does not grab the attention of the reader either.","dateCreated":"1260247174","smartDate":"Dec 7, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"jackieb1621","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/jackieb1621","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}}],"more":0}]},{"id":"17644727","dateCreated":"1259778909","smartDate":"Dec 2, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"meghanweis","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/meghanweis","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"},"monitored":false,"locked":false,"links":{"self":"https:\/\/fall20096plus1traitsscoring.wikispaces.com\/share\/view\/17644727"},"dateDigested":1532390396,"startDate":null,"sharedType":"discussion","title":"frogs","description":"I would score this piece as a three.  Although the writer included a lot of detail about frogs, they were weak when it came in engaging the audience.  They made no connection to the reader and their writing; they were just explaining facts about frogs.  This writing does not reflect unique or individual perspective on the topic.","replyPages":[{"page":0,"digests":[{"id":"17731833","body":"I would score this essay a three. It was interesting to read...like a textbook. It was just facts. There was no colorful language to engage the reader or make it interesting. It was bland. There was no connection to the writer and the topic, and there was no connection between the reader and the writer. Still, it was well-written. I'd score it as a three.","dateCreated":"1259891103","smartDate":"Dec 3, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"eileens.09","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/eileens.09","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17791627","body":"This is so boring, while I agree that it is somewhat well written I don't think it has a great use of expressive language. There's no connection personally and no way to tell who wrote it, no real personality in it except for the ending, which is still pretty monotone. Nothing moved me and there was little engagement. While the writer is aware of the audience (because it's informational) its not really engaging or any different from anything else you would read about frogs, there's little creativity, they could have taken this straight from their textbook with little thought to it. I don't agree with the scoring, I think it's a one, you need to remember that though the author can obviously write well, that wasn't what we are grading them on, we're grading their voice.","dateCreated":"1260035581","smartDate":"Dec 5, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"tr44701","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/tr44701","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17796829","body":"That's true. It was monotone and expressionless. Again, it was like reading from a text book. You've convinced me...I grade it a one.","dateCreated":"1260052244","smartDate":"Dec 5, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"eileens.09","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/eileens.09","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}},{"id":"17857991","body":"I guess I will agree as well to give this student a 1 as a well. Since we are grading on voice. It seems like the student is just writing to write and has direction for the audience who is reading this. It is like reading a text book, the readers are disconnected and will defnitely be uninterested. I would also expect more since the student is in 7th grade.","dateCreated":"1260218751","smartDate":"Dec 7, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"jackieb1621","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/jackieb1621","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"}}],"more":0}]}],"more":true},"comments":[]},"http":{"code":200,"status":"OK"},"redirectUrl":null,"javascript":null,"notices":{"warning":[],"error":[],"info":[],"success":[]}}